Friday, June 23, 2006

So Frustrating

Sometimes being a foster mommy is so frustrating. Especially when you allow yourself to get super attached and then have to stand back and watch the parents failing once again and messing with the children's minds.

That's kind of the situation I'm finding myself in. C's birth mom chose to put him back in foster care. She told her lawyer, me, and my caseworker that she was going to terminate her rights so we could adopt him. So of course, that makes me attach myself even more to this sweet little boy.

Well then we have visit days. C visits with his mom (when she shows up) for five hours one day a week. C cries when it's time for these visits to occur. He doesn't want to leave my house. But we calm him down and he goes. While there his mom allows him to do whatever he wants. He doesn't have to listen, and he eats candy and junk food non-stop. When visit time ends a social worker brings him back to my home.

Apparently the last two times after his visits he has cried for half the way home wanting "MY (mom's first name). He doesn't call her mom - just My (first name). Then when he gets home he is very defiant, out of control, and very aggressive towards the other kids. Oh and did I mention that he is fussy and cries at the drop of a hat. Going from no rules, to major structure is very difficult for this little boy.

So my frustration is this... WHY does she play with his mind and get him to really like being at her home when she knows she isn't going to keep him?

We go to court on Monday at 3:30 for the dispositional hearing. I'm praying that the birth mom will tell the judge she is terminating her rights. This little boy needs to be a part of my family forever...


At 2:11 PM, Blogger twostepsforward said...

Crossing my fingers for you guys - This is really heartbreaking. Those kids deserve stability.


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